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About Literature / Hobbyist Actually Quite UselessOther/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 5 Years
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Hey, guys. I know that I come and go for long periods of time, but this time I think it's with a bit more sense.

I've been gone for a while now, trying to get my personal and creative lives in order. Just like everyone else, I've been struggling with my personal life, but I think that things are starting to progress with a bit more clarity now. I'm trying to keep going forward while things are quiet and pleasant.

Creatively, well. That's where things get complicated and a bit horrible. I'm mostly uploading my stuff on tumblr, since that's where I am these days. It's been tumblr and AO3, honestly. I've been holding back from uploading things on dA because I feel as if my things are second rate and uninteresting. At the same time, I've been battling my paranoia when it comes to uploading on this site. (Still… a work in progress, unfortunately…) I've been keeping active with writing, and I'm working on my drawing. After I make something, I dump it all onto tumblr.

But I've realised that there's something wrong with that. First, I've started feeling like I've wanted my work to get more attention, which is something strange, horrible, and new to me. It's very hard to deal with. Secondly, I realised that I have lost my audience. They're still there, but they're not captive or responsive to anything I've put out. The fact that I'm so aware of that makes me feel trapped (and again horrible and strange). This has made me question what exactly I've been trying to achieve.

I mirror a lot of my works onto AO3 (for fan fiction) and Livejournal (for original works). In those two places, I find that there's a lot more reader response. I'm thankful for it, but when it comes to networking places like dA and tumblr, I'm suddenly too aware of where I stand as a creator.

I've been pushing myself to create better things, trying to improve, but that's a slow progress. The feedback I've received on tumblr has been mostly negative. That's followed closely by silence, and finally at the very bottom is positive encouragement. It's confusing because I feel as if I'm standing in an ocean by myself being overwhelmed by waves. I've been thinking about this for months, and I've been shaken ever since.

This is a very unique place to be. I'm still making things, but every day makes me question what I'm doing. I want to make a profit off of this current project of mine, but I think I'm hoping for too much. It's been damaging to deal with. And it gets worse because I keep going forward.

I closed my Patreon while I get my thoughts in order. I knew that I would have to start over from the very bottom and rebuild an audience. I no longer know how to do that. If anything, I'm just hoping that the stories I publish in the future will be enough of a selling point and give me some ground to stand on. My views towards drawing has probably taken the most damage, and that's just… It's really hard to combat that.

It's why I've been from dA as a whole. When I'm here, I get inspired to do something – to draw, to write, to network, to generally stay in touch. I'm not sure what to do with those feelings since they add to the conflict. I do apologise for being so incredibly silent though. I want to be active in groups and keep talking to people in comments. But I'm just…… in a really weird, isolating state of mind right now.

Hopefully, I end up making a decision about what to do in the future.

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PlatinaSi Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the watch! <3 I really appreciate it and I hope you enjoy my future works as well~ :iconallmyloveplz:
shoucchi Featured By Owner May 25, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the watch! :iconleeblushplz:
yupinukedem Featured By Owner May 25, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
No problem! Your art is A+.
shoucchi Featured By Owner May 25, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh my, thank you sweet person. 
I hope I don't disappoint. :;(∩´﹏`∩);:
DamaiMikaz Featured By Owner May 8, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks a lot for the watch. I'm glad you're taking such an interest in my artwork :hug:
kytsko Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2015
Thank you very much for the watch! \>w</ :heart:

*sorry for the late reply >.<*
yupinukedem Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
No problem at all!!
Bonds-webComic Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015  Professional Digital Artist
Cain and Abel : Thanks for the Llama!
Abel : If you have the time you can drop an eye over our comic if you haven't already *smiles wide*
yupinukedem Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Why, I do believe I'll do just that!
VFreie Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2015
Hi, and welcome to :iconthewrittenrevolution: theWrittenRevolution!
There are lots of things you can get involved in:

Bullet; Red we post monthly writing prompts (that include prizes, and a chat event during the month to help people with their pieces),

Bullet; Black publishing opportunities from other sites (whenever we come across one!),

Bullet; White we have a monthly feature that includes a deserving member, two of the best critiques we've seen during the month, and two helpful writing resources,

Bullet; Red a monthly affiliates feature of two Literature groups,

Bullet; Black and a biweekly-ish article in which one of our admins gives an in-depth critique to one of our members' work that hasn't received much feedback.

We'll soon be reviving our chatroom with weekly activities, so stay tuned for that too. :D (Big Grin)

We also have Facebook and Twitter accounts. On our profile page you will find links to the latest of all the activities I listed up here and to our social networks that will help you keep updated, so feel free to look around and ask if you have any questions, we're here to help!

Welcome to the revolution. I salute you!
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